The Tomlin Family: The Last 20 Weeks

As I mentioned, the last 20 weeks started off with me testing positive for GBS at 30,000 colonies, up from 5,000 4 weeks before. Thankfully, they ordered penicillin for me. Unfortunately, it didn't completely eliminate the bacteria from my urine. I still had 18,000 colonies at my next appointment at 23 weeks. They didn't give me more antibiotics then, but they did test me at my 25 week appointment. In those two weeks my colony count had gone to 50,000!! Super frustrating!! Thankfully, they decided to give me more antibiotics. This time is was ampicillin 4X per day for 7 days! A lot of antibiotics. I also began taking probiotics and will continue taking those throughout the rest of the pregnancy. I asked at just about every appointment about taking those, but none of the doctors thought it would do anything. I had finally decided to see if it would hurt, even if they didn't know if it would help. They said it would be fine, and at the 25 week appointment, the doctor was very encouraging about taking them and said she took them for all of their benefits.

Unfortunately, the ampicillin did nothing! I had over 100,000 colony count at my next appointment. That's when they treat anyone with GBS in their urine, but they usually wouldn't know it at that time because they don't test as often as they did with me. They ordered another round of antibiotics, and I quit using the probiotics to see if it made a difference. My culture after that round was contaminated, so it's hard to know, but after the next test, it was still over 100,000. Even though I told the doctors I surrendered on the oral antibiotics because obviously they weren't doing anything, they did order one more round. This time they decided to use Keflex. Guess what!!?? It finally worked! The only bacteria I had in my next culture was lactobacillus, which is a good bacteria found in dairy and probiotics.

Since GBS would not get out of my urine, and therefore allow me to feel like my colony count was at least reduced, I asked them to move up my amnio for fetal lung maturity to 36 weeks. After much discussion, they agreed and if he passed, they said would deliver the next day. This is an attempt to keep me from going into labor, more for my anxiety than medically necessary reasons since they don't believe the same thing will happen. Good luck convincing me of that! As I'm writing this, I've had the amnio and am waiting on the results to find out if we go in tomorrow to deliver a baby!

One of the things I've had to give up and grieve in addition to the loss of Leah, is having "normal" childbirth. Getting the thrill of going into labor, doing what I believe is best for baby and mom and having a vaginal birth. All of that has been taken away too. I know I could try, but I really don't believe my anxiety level and mental state could handle knowing he's exposed to GBS, even for the short amount of time from our house to the hospital and until getting antibiotics started. I'm not sure anyone can understand this part of grieving unless you've been there and not gotten the birth you expected, nor can you ever really have one. I wanted to try a VBAC, but most doctors weren't big on it because of my high colonization of GBS, previous loss, etc. But, after having such a high colony count of GBS for most of the pregnancy, I decided I couldn't really do it either. I'm thankful I got all of that with Taylor, but I still wish I could have it again. It's much harder than I imagined to lose that option.

Another difficulty during these last 20 weeks was that several friends had their second little girl and seeing all of their pictures on Facebook and Instagram of the sisters. Pictures and memories I never got to have. This will always been the case for me, and I guess over time it will hurt a little less. I'll also never know why God chose us to bear this burden, this suffering, when so many other people get both of their children, their sisters...

Having said all of that, we are extremely excited and ready to meet our baby boy! I can't wait to have him in my arms. I will still be a little paranoid and anxious for several months due to the possibility of late-onset GBS, but hopefully I'll be a little bit better.

Below are the last 20 (16) weeks of pregnancy pictures. Taylor took most of these! I look so much bigger at 36 weeks now than I did with Leah. I hope that means he is a big boy! Last week they estimated him to weigh 5 lbs 13 oz. I'm hoping he's at least 6 lbs!

~24 weeks